But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
