Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
