My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
