dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
