the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
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