also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
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