Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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