hell yes lets make some ravioli
i think i have herpe
just one?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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