(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
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