I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
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