We're facebook friends in real life
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
