Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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