We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
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So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
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He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
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