Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
