She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
