garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
