I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Your tits are I can't wait for
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Randomize
