Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
