I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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