Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
