he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Randomize
