dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
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