I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I feel like death gave me a hand job
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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