are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Still dying that you shit outside
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize