it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize
