wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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