he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
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