i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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