That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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