these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
