and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Randomize
