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I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
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