He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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