You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
