Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
