I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
