Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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