my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Randomize
