Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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