Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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