the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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