i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Randomize
