Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Randomize
