So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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