I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize