you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
