she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
