I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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