Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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