We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
