the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Last time i carry you out of a forest
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
