what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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